Mother is God. She is the Creator and Giver of Life. She is Loved by her adoring partner – your Father. This goes back to their Mothers and Fathers; and theirs. And so back. Your Lineage.
“Walking. I am listening to a deeper way. Suddenly, all my Ancestors are behind me. Be still, they say. Watch and Listen. You are the result of the Love of thousands.” – Linda Hogan
– we hope. If not, it’s because a Man has raped a Woman or a Girl. If not, it is his fault. This is just a fact; accept it. It is Man who has polluted Life’s Lineage, and Raped God.
Because of this, some Mothers may be Injured by Lineage; the Vibrations of Trauma in her ovaries that were formed in her own Mother. Like Matryoshka Dolls.
If she was forced to be a Mother and didn’t want to be, or wasn’t ready, nor supported, she may have unconsciously injured you.
It is up to you, to end this now.
To Heal this Ancestral Karma. Call on your Loving-Lineage immediately; ask for their Strengths, ask for their Healing, ask for their Love and Support. Stand Strong, and Proud, and Loved – somewhere along the way, Mother-God wanted offspring in the form of you. ❤️ She Loved a Man enough to Create Life, have Babies, make a Family, build a Home. Somewhere along the way, they were a Team. She could chop wood, too, but he did it when she didn’t want to. They were a Team. That Team lives in your Heart. Light a candle for them, each night from now on.
– it’s ok if you miss a day.
All of Life should revolve around the safety and happiness of Women, for they may become Mothers – but they don’t have to. Men should respect Women; the God of this world. Goddess. Respect her Light. Respect her Darkness.
There are only two sexes. Anyone who told you other than this is lying to you, and fragmenting your soul. They are tearing apart the Team in your Heart; The Mother-God and her Lover who Love you Forever; they swore.❤️
Less than 2% of humans are born with deformed genitals, politely called: VSD. They are still identifiable as male or female through Karyotype Testing. The percentage is so tiny, that their personal physical conditions matter only to them, their doctors, and their partners. Parents: don’t mutilate your children if they have VSD – they might grow out of it during puberty, like the Guervedoces do.
Most Humans are Heterosexual. On average, 10% of humans are homosexual. The numbers of same-sex activity are higher – meaning plenty of people dabble. It’s no big deal, it’s how we get closer to knowing ourselves. It’s quite complicated, but if you like stats, that’s about it.
There are only two-sexes, and here are 40+ peer-reviewed papers to prove it to you. Anyone who tells you otherwise is lying to you and trying to shatter your Soul. Remember your Loving-Lineage, and honour them.❤️ If you are already fragmented and manifesting or projecting your unwellness, get help; before it’s too late. Look into Soul Retrieval.
I thought I learned it all, you know? ALL the codes. All the patterns. All the numerology, astrology, ‘human design’, and maps. All the holo-matrixes…
WELL. I was wrong!
I just learned this, today!
Well – not even learned it; learned of it.
✨HOLOGENESIS✨ “THE GENE CODE”
It operates on a tri-level coding; we have THE SHADOW; THE GIFT; and THE SIDDHIS.
Anna Marks says: “After I met Richard I was impressed by his inner warmth, gentleness, and calmness. Later I found out he wrote/received through channeling the book during seven years of daily work. At the beginning, I didn’t even know how to read it. It has 64 chapters, each with a particular divine key to be explored and transcended – and each key has three possible expressions in our lives – the Shadow (victim tendency), the Gift (creative genius) and the Siddhi (divine essence). Briefly, Gene Keys is a codebook describing all human states of consciousness, from the deepest fear-based patterns to the most awe-inspiring possibilities in our DNA, based on the I Ching – The book of Changes – and the Human Design system, along with all the new discoveries from genetics and quantum physics. A lifetime isn’t enough to deeply read it. The creator admitted he continues to study the profound lessons contained in the book.”
Start your New Year off on the right foot! Decode your profile, today!👇🏽
Now; I haven’t even begun to understand how it works, or to correlate it to astrology – I just read my profile, and wondered how the fuck it knew so much about me, across all dimensions of synchronicity and my research, to date… I am very well-versed in the I CHING (pronounced ‘yee-jing’), which also operates on a tri-level code.
Human Design was always too complex for me; it did alert me to the fact that I am a “flat-battery” without someone with me. I am activated by others. Light’s ON! lol
SO I read some of these descriptions, and I was like: WOAH. And even some stuff, I was like, “yeah… I know this, but I have fallen, here on earth. I am well-aware of “The Big Picture”, AND “The Fates” – I wrote a book about it! ffs!” lol It’s like I’m supposed to be thrilled about my trauma, or something… the “not-knowing”, and the not-understanding WHY ON EARTH HELL IS HERE. Anyway; I have only just discovered it, and have so much to learn…
I’m about to embark upon the 9 page origin-article – HOLOGENESIS AND THE SACRED WOUND (sounds like Chiron…?), and I’ll put all the links you need, below!
The last time I felt so seen, was reading the CHANDRA DEGREES, by Elias Lonsdale… and long ago, when I was a kid… this book on Chinese 9 Year Cycles, that I have never found again. You changed into a different personality, every 9 years, or something…
you need your birth time!
Also: now I know about the I CHING, I can see it in the title!
Ok; page 1, and I am sensing, what he calls “The Sacred Wound”, is actually the metaphorical birth-canal/Vesica Piscis of The Goddess.
I once wrote about how the 0, “gave birth” to all the numbers, one-though-nine. Something I interpreted from the Sacred Geometry/Symbolism from the work of Marko Rodin.
I just went ahead and rescued it from fb; made it into its own blog post.
… so, my point it, he uses the words “wound”, and “healing” – I don’t know enough about him, yet, but this echoes more the missing relationship that humans have to The Goddess; she isn’t a wound that needs healing – missing Her, is the wound, that needs healing.
Anyway; I’m speculating, and thinking out loud. When humans think of god as masculine, they totally miss out on the birthing.
“The finale is called the Pearl Sequence – once our heart begins to open we witness the organic flowering of our prosperity. These themes of purpose, love and prosperity flow naturally out of each other as a sequence – the Golden Path. The Pearl is a very special sequence because it has not yet fully emerged into the modern world. The Pearl concerns the birth of collective intelligence. Once our hearts have opened, the true meaning of prosperity in our lives completely changes. Instead of being about personal achievement, prosperity is realised as a need to be of service to something greater than ourselves. Our hearts wish for only one thing – to use our highest gifts to help others.”
Yes, well… I already am the Pearl/Seed, descending into the Hellish Earth Realm. Being THAT, did not bring me ‘prosperity’ – but ruin. I come undone. From wholeness, to shredded. Fractured. … which some have esoterically pointed out, as 🌈… the spectrum of Light. If you know me, you will know that my book… was designed in such a way. Shattered Light.
Anyway, I am near the end of the 9-page thing, and I’m really feeling some kind of “coming full-circle” moment, since we both decoded something around 2013. This “Gene Key” is like, my mirror. For today. Within time. It’s a revelation, for sure. I think reading the interpretation of my keys, acted as some kind of Soul-Retrieval.
(the last two pages took me to hell – lol. I do not have this ‘hole’ in the centre of my being. I found it here, in the world, as “The Hunger”, in others.)
Currently, with Chiron in Pisces, opposite my Virgo Stellium, I have been dealing with HEALTH, a lot. Chronic Health problems, and more…
I LOLLED; when I read this.
I write letters to my doctor, telling her how much I just need to express myself, and be listened to. Intricately. It is SO important to my health!
Even to an audience of one; I am happy with the genuineness, and the intimacy. Real Connection. Real Friendship. Real Exchange.
So, I mean it when I say I WANNA SEE A SCREENSHOT OF YOUR HEALTH NEEDS! Or, whichever one spoke to you the most.
The other parts about me that were so profound were:
How I MUST work with relationships – which is basically all I do, to heal people’s ability to connect and evolve, and how much I LOVE and NEED “alone time”. “One thing is certain — your Life’s Work involves working in relationships.” “No matter how much you try to lead a quiet, harmonious life, the fates will always come knocking on your door.” “Your physical, mental, and emotional health depend on your being listened to!” “Your purpose on the earth is to empty yourself of all self-interest so a myth incarnates through your life.” 👈🏽 (this one correlates exactly to my Sun Chandra Degree)
I swear I want to take this to my doctor and SHOW her, how it is written, everything I have been saying to her about wanting to be alone, and be listened to. Haha…
*originally posted by Mardi Shakti on May 24, 2015
In an effort to understand Chiron’s influence, deeply, I’ve decided to take a look at its discovery chart.
Firstly: it’s a Scorpio Snake; a magical combination, if there ever was. Snakes are Mystical and Mysterious – transformative, artistic, deep.
Scorpio also has the potential to be the shaman – but stings on a mundane level; the alchemy of fiery-desire and watery emotion.
Scorpio is in the 11th House: plumbing the multi-dimensional depth of the Humanitarian of the Future. This house, is also about technology – or utilising the tools of the present moment to evolve, remedy society (people), and heal. It is also conjunct Uranus; emphasizing the power of revelation, shock, sudden insight, and “time-rips”. Doing things in an unconventional way. Completely eccentric – in Scorpio, no less; revolutionizing sex and death. Illuminating – suddenly – the connection between them, and the cycles of Life, from womb to tomb.
Pluto – Scorpios Ruler – is up there, conjunct the North Node in Libra: Relationship. (MC?) With Devoted Vesta, keeping the flame of service, insight, illumination, and Love, alive. North Node in Libra means that, karmically, work is to be done together. Healing of other is healing of self. Transformation of other, is transformation of self: mirror and depth. Alice in Wonderland-type of reflection…
(why Chiron spends soooooo long in Aries; alone is suffering. Self and Selfish is the biggest wounding, in need of extensive transformation).
Next notable: Rising Sign conjunct Galactic Centre! (1 degree orb; but if it moves, might have been exact at the time). Direct download of Cosmic Dawn. The embodiment of “knowing”, and perfect direction and guidance.
Chart Ruler – Jupiter – is opposite the way, in the 7th House of the other: teamwork, contracts, and partnerships. In nurturing Cancer, Love heals. Sanctuary, Tribe, Comfort, Care… Feeling of Family. It is conjunct the Moon, in her own sign of Cancer, further emphasizing and magnifying the power and benevolence of feeling, empathy, emotion, and “timing” – The Cosmic Clock-keeper: Moon. Mixing the Time-Travelling Sun with the Time-Keeping Moon.
The first thing that stood out, was the shape of a a triangle between Chiron, Venus, and Mars. (again, I’m on my phone, so can’t see as clearly as I’d like! But: -)
Chiron is opposite Venus: seeking the Tantra of Love. Venus in natural home of Libra, emphasising that she is exactly what and where she needs to be; bringing her full power to the chart, and secret power of Chiron. Chiron mirrors her purpose, and blends it with Mars: seeding a kind of androgyny as its super-power.
Mars is in Leo: A noble warrior, spurred by Courage, Heart, and Radiance. In the 8th House, fighting for transformation. Bringing The Sun where it don’t shine. – putting Mars and the Sun in Mutual Reception? (maybe in some vague and subtle way…)
(since on phone, Venus might be quite a wide orb? Or: Chiron is opposite Pallas in Scorpio – master strategist! Soul Detective; which Scorpio is naturally.)
– o wait: where is Chiron, even?! Taurus… 4th House, representing ties to Venus and The Moon. Bringing it’s medicine to Home, family, Psyche, Heart, and Relationship. In Taurus, the focus is on the embodiment; the physical, the senses, all that is treasured and valued.
“The Arabic script of the wings (in mirror image of each other) reads: “Ya Hazrati Inayat”, with ya meaning “O” (an invocation, an invitation), and hazrati meaning “presence; a respectful title similar to your majesty”. It may also be interesting to note that the word ‘Inayat means “guarding, preserving, taking care of; concern, care; a gift, a present”.
The Arabic script of the heart reads: “qaddasa Allahu sirrahu”, which is a traditional phrase used when mentioning the name of a deceased Sufi saint. The word qaddas means: “sanctify, hallow, glorify, venerate, revere”. The word sirr means: “secret, mystery, something concealed; secret thought, innermost thought”, or, as the masterful lexicon of E. W. Lane says, “private knowledge; something inserted in the interior; a pleasure, or delight, and dilation of the heart, of which there is no external sign”. The Sufis often use the word sirr to describe the divine wonder discovered in the depths of the un-veiled heart.
The phrase exoterically means “may Allah sanctify his secret” or esoterically “may his message spread”, or “whose inner thought Allah made holy”, or “whose heart Allah has made pure”.
The shape of the tughra symbolises that the heart desires heaven. The crescent in the heart suggests the responsiveness and potential of the heart. The crescent represents the responsiveness of the crescent moon to the light of the sun, for naturally it receives the light and develops into a full moon. The explanation of the five-pointed star is that it represents the divine light. For when the light comes, it has five points. It is the divine light which is represented by the five-pointed star, and the star is reflected in the heart which is responsive to the divine light. The heart which by its response has received the divine light is liberated, as the wings show. In brief, the meaning of the symbol is that the heart responsive to the light of God is liberated.” ~ wiki
“O, Divine Presence! Your name is safe here.” ~ Mardi Shakti ~
Ecstasy finds you.
*~ In sufi circles they say: “There’s prayer, and a step up from that is meditation, and a step up from that is sohbet, or conversation.” Who is talking to HU! (The pronoun for divine presence.) Lover to beloved, teacher to disciple. The Friendship of Rumi and Shams became a continuous conversation, in silence and words, presence talking to absence, existence to non-existence, periphery to center. Rumi’s poetry may be heard as eavesdropping on that exchange.” ~* Coleman Barks http://www.sourcetext.com/hupage/Rumi/rumi0.html
OUT OF A GREAT NEED – HAFIZ
“Out of a great need We are all holding hands and climbing
Not loving is a letting go
Listen, The terrain around here Is far too dangerous for that.”
There are many people with their eyes open whose hearts are shut. What do they see? Matter.
But someone whose love is alert, even if the eyes go to sleep, he or she will be waking up thousands of others.
If you are not one of those light-filled lovers, restrain your desire-body’s intensity. Put limits on how much you eat and how long you lie down.
But if you are awake here in the chest, sleep long and soundly.
Your spirit will be out roaming and working, even on the seventh level.
Muhammad says, I close my eyes and rest in sleep, but my love never needs rest.
*~ Rumi ~*
“Ordinary love is selfish, darkly rooted in desires and satisfactions.
Divine love is without condition, without boundary, without change.
The flux of the human heart is gone forever at the transfixing touch of pure love”. ~ Swami Sri Yukteswar
Make no mistake; until the human heart is torn asunder, it cannot know Divine Love. The Flame That Never Dies. Recognised, or not, by others, or the self.
“Unconditional Love” is an elusive term, and often misunderstood… it simply means PURE.
…until tainted by humanimal behaviour stemming from the disconnection of Universal Consciousness, and living out of alignment…
Whole Things are hurt by the shattered. Pieces grasping for pieces. Or trying to cut a piece from the Whole.
The pain of formless form… (“without boundary”)
What so happens to All, happens to The One Heart.
…but no one can teach you about the Pure Heart; it’s an initiation. Although the teachings are there, if you so happen to become initiated. ~ Mardi Shakti ~
Q: WHEN I FEEL DEEP LOVE I FEEL SAD AT THE SAME TIME. WHY?
Osho: Real love always brings sadness. It is inevitable – because love creates a space which opens new doors to your being. Love brings a twilight situation.
In the moment of love you can see what is unreal and what is real. In the moment of love you can see what is meaningless, what is meaningful, and at the same time you see you are rooted in the meaningless – hence sadness. In the moment of love you become aware of your ultimate potential, you become aware of the farthest peak, but you are not there – hence sadness.
You see a vision but it is a vision, and within a moment it will be gone. It is as if God has spoken to you in a dream and when you are awake you miss it. You know something has happened but it has not become a reality. It was just a passing breeze.
If love does not create sadness then know well it is not love. Love is bound to create sadness – the greater the love, the greater will be the sadness in the wake of it.
Love opens the door to God. Two hearts come close, very, very close, but in that very closeness they can see the separation – that is the sadness. When you are far away you cannot see it so clearly. You know you are separate but when you desire to be one with somebody and you long for it and there is great passion for it and you come close and you come close and then comes a moment when you are very, very close but beyond which you cannot go, you are stuck – suddenly you become sad. The goal is so close by and yet it is beyond reach.
Sometimes after love you will fall into a deep frustrating night. Those who have not known love have not known the real misery, they have not known the real anguish. They live a flat kind of life.
They have not known the peaks so they are not aware of the valleys. They have not reached to the maximum so they think that whatsoever they are doing is what life is supposed to be like. In love for a moment you become that which you should be. But it is only momentary.
If you want it to become an eternal reality for you then love itself is not enough – then prayer will be needed. Love makes you aware of this need – and unless you start moving in prayer, love will create more and more sadness.
You cannot become one in love. You can only have an illusion of becoming one. And that is the great desire – how to be one, how to be one with the whole, how to fall in rapport with reality, how to disappear utterly. Because if you are, there is misery; if you are, there is anguish; if you are, there is anxiety. The very ego creates the problem. When you melt and disappear, when you become one, there is nobody left behind. You are just a wave in this eternal ocean of existence. You don’t have a centre of your own; the centre of the whole has become your centre. Then anxiety disappears, then anguish disappears, then the potential has become actual. This is what is called enlightenment, this is what is called nirvana or God-realisation.
Love is moving in the same direction, but it can only promise, it cannot fulfil. It cannot deliver the goods – hence the sadness. You feel you are coming very close to the point where you can disappear and yet you don’t disappear. Again you start falling away from your beloved. Again and again you will come close and again and again you will fall back into your aloneness. But you will never become one. And unless you become one, ecstasy is not possible.
In the moment of love there is great hope. You have arrived – and yet you never arrive. You feel it is almost going to happen – now this is the moment – and the moment comes and passes by and you are left again in the same wasteland as you have always been in. The clouds gather and it never rains and the desert remains a desert. If those clouds don’t gather you will not be so hopeful. You know it is a desert. You accept it. You adjust to it. But one day suddenly you see great clouds gathering, you feel it in the winds that it is going to rain you feel it all around that it is going to rain, your heart starts pulsating that now this desert will no more be a desert, now green trees will grow and birds will sing and there will be celebration…. And those clouds start disappearing.
Have you not seen it? Some day, walking in a dark night on a dark street, suddenly a car passes by with a flood of light. And after the car has gone the darkness is more than before. What happened?
You were walking in the same night in the same darkness, but those lights, those headlights of the car, suddenly filled your eyes with light for a moment. Now in comparison the darkness is more. For a few minutes you may not be able to see at all. You will be left completely blind. This has been done by the light.
Exactly the same is the situation… when you are in love you are flooded with light. But then it is gone – it comes and it goes, it is momentary. And in the wake is great sadness.
Berdyaev says: ‘Love in particular seemed to me to carry within itself the seed of anguish and I have frequently been amazed that people could experience the exaltation of love as sheer joy and happiness. Eros is in anguish for it is concerned with and deeply rooted in the mystery of time and eternity. It concerns time athirst for eternal fulfilment and yet never attaining it.
‘Likewise there is anguish in sex. Sex shows man wounded, fallen apart, and never able to attain true fullness through union. It bids man to go out to another but he returns once more into himself and the anguish of his longing for unity continues unrelieved The desire for wholeness cannot be satisfied through sex; on the contrary, it only serves to deepen the wounds of disunity.’
The very word ‘sex’ comes from a Latin root ‘sexus’ which means division. Sex divides. It promises to unite but it never does. In fact, it divides. But there is a great desire in man to be united. The child in the mother’s womb is united with existence. He has no separate existence. He has no separate reality. He is part of the whole. He has no self, no higher consciousness. He is, but he is not yet an ego. And that remains our deepest longing – how to enter into the womb of existence again.
While two join in love they are trying to create a unity – hence the attraction of love and hence the appeal of sex. But it never happens. Or, it happens for such a split second only that it doesn’t matter really whether it happens or not. In fact, on the contrary, it creates more desire for unity – more desire and more longing for the ultimate union. And each time frustration comes to hand. If you have eyes to see and if you have a heart to feel you will become sad; whenever you are in love you will become sad. Again the promise and again you know it is not going to be fulfilled.
So sex functions like alcohol, a natural alcohol. It is provided in the chemistry of the body but it is an intoxicant, it is a drug. It depends on chemistry. It is as chemical as LSD, marijuana – the difference is only that it is bio-chemical, it is already provided by nature in the body. But it is a chemical phenomenon. Through chemistry you attain a glimpse. That’s what happens when you take LSD – through chemistry you attain a glimpse. That’s what happens through all kinds of intoxicants – for a moment you forget yourself. Even that momentary forgetfulness opens a window.
But forgetfulness is not a dissolution. You are not dissolved. You are there, waiting. Once the drug has worn off, the ego will grab you again. The ego has to be dissolved, not forgotten. That’s the sadness of love: the ego is only forgotten and that too for a moment. Then it comes back. And comes back with vengeance. Hence you will find lovers fighting continuously. The ego becomes even more solid, crystallised.
And that’s why you find lovers always thinking in terms of the other cheating them. Nobody is cheating. But you desired, you hoped, you fantasised a state of unity, and you were thinking that great ecstasy was going to happen and it didn’t happen – somebody has cheated you. Of course, naturally, the other becomes the object. And the other also thinks in the same way – that you have cheated him or her. Nobody is cheating. Love has cheated you both. Chemistry has cheated you both. Unconsciousness has cheated you both. Ego has cheated you both. If you understand you will not fight with each other.
That’s all that Sufism is about – how to dissolve the ego.
A few things more…. The sadness that love brings is very potential, it is very deep, it is very healthy, it is helpful. It will lead you to God. So don’t take it negatively, use it. It is a great blessing, that sadness felt in love. It simply shows that your aspiration is beyond the capacity of love, your aspiration is for the ultimate. Love can only give you a momentary satisfaction but not an eternal contentment. Feel grateful that love gave you that one momentary satisfaction and feel grateful that love made you aware of a tremendous sadness inside you.
When people are together in love they feel very alone. Nobody else ever feels such aloneness as lovers feel. Can’t you remember it? While sitting holding the hand of your beloved on a full moon night, have you not felt it? – utterly alone. The other is there, you are there and you both are for each other, there is no conflict – yet there is no bridge. You are alone, she is alone… two alonenesses sitting together. And each making the other more aware of his own aloneness or her own aloneness.
Love is a great experience. It makes you feel one absolute truth – that you are born alone, that you live alone, that you die alone. And there is no way to drown this aloneness in drugs – whether those drugs are manufactured by nature in the trees or by factories or in the body. There is no way to drown this aloneness. One has to understand this aloneness, one has to penetrate this aloneness, one has to go into its very core. And when you have reached into the very core of your aloneness, suddenly- it is no longer aloneness, it is the very presence of God. You are alone because God is alone.
Tantra is the answer; Tantra is Yoga, Yoga is union. Tantra includes Creatrix… Tantra dissolves the ego… Neo-tantra just fetishizes it.
“…Let’s adore one another before there is no more of you and me.” *~ Rumi ~*
My Sweet Crushed Angel ~ Hafiz
You have not danced so badly, my dear, Trying to hold hands with the Beautiful One. You have waltzed with great style, My sweet, crushed angel, To have ever neared God’s heart at all.
Our Partner is notoriously difficult to follow, And even His best musicians are not always easy To hear. So what if the music has stopped for a while. So what If the price of admission to the Divine Is out of reach tonight. So what, my dear, If you do not have the ante to gamble for Real Love. The mind and the body are famous For holding the heart ransom, But Hafiz knows the Beloved’s eternal habits. Have patience, For he will not be able to resist your longing For long. You have not danced so badly, my dear, Trying to kiss the Beautiful One. You have actually waltzed with tremendous style, O my sweet, O my sweet, crushed angel.
“If the Beautiful One is not inside you, then what is that Light hidden under your cloak?” *~ Rumi ~*
“Many different perfumes carried by a breeze.”
We bear within us many past lives, each one complete, autonomous, and emitting its own subtle, special fragrance. There are points along the journey when we must stand together with the whole line-up of our previous selves and follow out the journey they were all leading to. This is a formidable task. There is a lot to live up to. It grants you authority and conviction and it makes it very hard to get started. In order to get anywhere you must at times deny the awareness that everybody is there, and do whatever you can do, apparently on your own. But truly the depth of experience, the substantive inward development and the power of your inner drive give it away – you are destiny-charged in a larger-than-life fashion. Being self-possessed is your watchword. There is so much to accomplish. And at the center of the journey lies self-knowledge and the overriding determination to clear the karmic slate, to free up what has been trapped and bound and to come to yourself afresh. This destiny-will is guided, cosmically supported, centrally relevant to your whole world, and you will do it. Turn the darkest of hours into the brightest breakthroughs by refusing to stop anywhere or to back down from your resolve to wake up this time and get on with the greater path, at long last. ~ Ellias Lonsdale
People have a *lot* to learn about Real Love. Shopping for relationships is not how that works, but that’s something that can take lifetimes to figure out…
“For the sake of simplicity, I have found the “four-layers of the heart” model to be an extremely useful and timeless spiritual perspective on all aspects of my life, especially for understanding relationships. Put simply, the four layers of the heart are as follows:
Layer 1: the uppermost layer of the heart, or the ego self. Layer 1 is where the ego is rooted in the heart; it is the emotional underpinnings of the ego. We all need a healthy ego to function in the world but the downside comes from the ego needing to be in control, to dominate, criticize, put itself first, to grasp and horde. The Sufi word for the lower tendencies of the ego is “the nafs”. The ego uses emotions from the surface layer of the heart—such as anger, jealousy, fear—to fuel and justify its limited and separative view of itself and the world.The ego also has a higher side—the rational mind with its capacity for logic and objectivity. The rational mind can hold and reflect a certain degree of spiritual light, according to the Sufis, if it is connected to the deeper layers of the heart.
Layer 2: the inner heart. In Arabic, the word for heart is “qalb” which means “that which turns”. This definition is profound because the heart does seem to turn. Sometimes it feels open and full, other times it feels contracted and empty—oftentimes for no reason we can identify. Sometimes the heart faces the world and is overly influenced by externals that disturb it; other times the heart faces the Source within and finds itself at peace despite whatever is happening on the outside.In Layer 2, the heart begins to free itself from the demands of the grasping ego. It is in Layer 2 that the expansive feelings of unconditional love, joy, compassion, awe, prayerfulness, gratitude, the appreciation of beauty, serenity and contentment are experienced. Greater sensitivity and the ability to attune to subtle shifts in feeling, atmosphere, mood (your’s or others’) come in at this layer.
Layer 3: the soul. This layer is less personal than Layer 2 and even further removed from an ego-based perspective. Sufis teach that it is in the soul where our spiritual jewels or divine qualities reside in seed form. The divine qualities are the archetypes that find expression in the world in manifold ways. Expressions of power, love, wisdom, justice and patience are examples of the divine qualities made manifest, although usually they are distorted by the personal heart and the ego. There is a deep stillness and profound silence to be experienced in the depths of Layer 3 that contrasts with the waves of emotion closer to the surface in Layer 2 of the heart.
Layer 4: the secret. What is the secret? According to the Sufis, it is the truth of our oneness or unity with the Divine. It is difficult to use words to describe this experience. At Layer 4, the bubble of the separate self dissolves and transforms into the Ocean. All definitions of ourselves—“I am this”, “I am that”—are experienced as temporary illusions that veil us from the reality of our true Self.Each layer of the heart has a corresponding inner “voice” that whispers advice in our ear and urges us to take certain actions based on its own perspective. Sufi learn to discriminate between these voices, to distinguish between the voice of the “nafs”, for instance, and the voice of the deep heart.” ~ Joe Disabatino https://www.yogitimes.com/article/sufism-relationships-four-layers-of-heart
Most live and act from here; relationship dramas, never touching the deeper place… “Layer 1: the uppermost layer of the heart, or the ego self.
I Know The Way You Can Get
I know the way you can get When you have not had a drink of Love:
Your face hardens, Your sweet muscles cramp. Children become concerned About a strange look that appears in your eyes Which even begins to worry your own mirror And nose.
Squirrels and birds sense your sadness And call an important conference in a tall tree. They decide which secret code to chant To help your mind and soul.
Even angels fear that brand of madness That arrays itself against the world And throws sharp stones and spears into The innocent And into one’s self.
O I know the way you can get If you have not been drinking Love:
You might rip apart Every sentence your friends and teachers say, Looking for hidden clauses.
You might weigh every word on a scale Like a dead fish.
You might pull out a ruler to measure From every angle in your darkness The beautiful dimensions of a heart you once Trusted.
I know the way you can get If you have not had a drink from Love’s Hands.
That is why all the Great Ones speak of The vital need To keep remembering God, So you will come to know and see Him As being so Playful And Wanting, Just Wanting to help.
That is why Hafiz says: Bring your cup near me. For all I care about Is quenching your thirst for freedom!
All a Sane man can ever care about Is giving Love!
Of course; it’s so simple: The Heart of the world is CLOSED.
“Also, evil and darkness prevail to a large extent and people are cut off from Source/God/Highest Truth. The heart is closed and there is no place for love or light to come in. This is what third dimensional reality is all about. That explains all the violence, war, racism, suppression, disease, unrest (at individual and global levels) and everything negative that happened in Earth’s history and continues to happen around the globe even today. Living at a higher dimension opens the heart and allows light into the world, thereby transmuting the prevalent darkness into light.”
UNLESS THE WORLD KICKS YOU IN YOUR HEART AND IT DIES – and then you’re trapped here, on earth, until *you* die.
“Jung’s conception of the psyche is of a system which is dynamic, in constant movement, and at the same time self-regulating; he calls the general psychic energy, libido. The concept of libido must not be thought of as implying a force as such, any more than does the concept of energy in physics; it is simply a convenient way of describing the observed phenomena.
The libido flows between two opposing poles — an analogy might be drawn here with the diastole and systole of the heart, or a comparison made between the positive and negative poles of an electric circuit. Jung usually refers to the opposing poles as ‘the opposites’. The greater the tension between the pairs of opposites the greater the energy; without opposition there is no manifest energy. Many opposites at varying levels can be enumerated; for instance, progression, the forward movement of energy, and regression, the backward, consciousness and unconsciousness, extroversion and introversion, thinking and feeling, &c. The opposites have a regulating function (as Heraclitus discovered many hundred years ago), and when one extreme is reached libido passes over into its opposite.
A simple example of this is to be found in the way that an attitude carried to one extreme will gradually change into something quite different: violent rage is succeeded by calm, and hatred not infrequently turns in the end to liking. To Jung the regulatory function of the opposites is inherent in human nature and essential to an understanding of psychic functioning.
The natural movement of the libido is forwards and backwards — one could almost think of it as the movement of the tides. Jung calls the forward movement which satisfies the demands of the conscious, progression, the backward movement, satisfying the demands of the unconscious, regression. Progression is concerned with the active adaptation to one’s environment, and regression with the adaptation to one’s inner needs. Regression therefore (contrary to some points of view) is just as normal a counterpole to progression as sleeping is to waking, so long as the libido is functioning in an unhindered manner, i.e. according to the law of enantiodromia, when it must eventually turn over into a progressive movement.
Regression may mean, among other things, a return to a dream-state after a period of concentrated and directed mental activity, or it may mean a return to an earlier stage of development; but these are not necessarily ‘wrong’, rather can they be looked on as restorative phases ‘reculer pour mieux sauter’.
If there is an attempt to force the libido into a rigid channel, or repression has created a barrier, or for one reason or another, the conscious adjustment has failed (perhaps because outer circumstances became too difficult), the natural, forward movement becomes impossible. The libido then flows back into the unconscious, which will eventually become over-charged with energy seeking to find some outlet. Perhaps the unconscious will then leak through into consciousness as fantasy, or as some neurotic symptom, perhaps it will manifest itself in infantile or even animal behavior. It may even overwhelm consciousness so that there is a violent outburst, or a psychosis develops; when this happens it is as if a dam had burst, and all the land was flooded. In extreme cases, where there is a complete failure of the libido to find an outlet, there is a withdrawal from life, as in some psychotic states; this is a pathological regression, and is unlike normal regression, which is a necessity of life.
A man is not a machine who can continually and steadily adapt himself to his environment; he must also be in harmony with himself, i.e. adapt to his own inner world. Conversely, he can only adapt to his inner world and achieve harmony with himself when he is adapted to the environmental conditions.” ~ Frieda Fordham
“We don’t commit now. We don’t see the point. They’ve always said there are so many fish in the sea, but never before has that sea of fish been right at our fingertips on OkCupid, Tinder, Grindr, Dattch, take your pick. We can order up a human being in the same way we can order up pad thai on Seamless. We think intimacy lies in a perfectly-executed string of emoji. We think effort is a “good morning” text. We say romance is dead, because maybe it is, but maybe we just need to reinvent it. Maybe romance in our modern age is putting the phone down long enough to look in each other’s eyes at dinner. Maybe romance is deleting Tinder off your phone after an incredible first date with someone. Maybe romance is still there, we just don’t know what it looks like now. When we choose—if we commit—we are still one eye wandering at the options. We want the beautiful cut of filet mignon, but we’re too busy eyeing the mediocre buffet, because choice. Because choice. Our choices are killing us. We think choice means something. We think opportunity is good. We think the more chances we have, the better. But, it makes everything watered-down. Never mind actually feeling satisfied, we don’t even understand what satisfaction looks like, sounds like, feels like. We’re one foot out the door, because outside that door is more, more, more. We don’t see who’s right in front of our eyes asking to be loved, because no one is asking to be loved. We long for something that we still want to believe exists. Yet, we are looking for the next thrill, the next jolt of excitement, the next instant gratification. We soothe ourselves and distract ourselves and, if we can’t even face the demons inside our own brain, how can we be expected to stick something out, to love someone even when it’s not easy to love them? We bail. We leave. We see a limitless world in a way that no generation before us has seen. We can open up a new tab, look at pictures of Portugal, pull out a Visa, and book a plane ticket. We don’t do this, but we can. The point is that we know we can, even if we don’t have the resources to do so. There are always other tantalizing options. Open up Instagram and see the lives of others, the life we could have. See the places we’re not traveling to. See the lives we’re not living. See the people we’re not dating. We bombard ourselves with stimuli, input, input, input, and we wonder why we’re miserable. We wonder why we’re dissatisfied. We wonder why nothing lasts and everything feels a little hopeless. Because, we have no idea how to see our lives for what they are, instead of what they aren’t. And, even if we find it. Say we find that person we love who loves us. Commitment. Intimacy. “I love you.” We do it. We find it. Then, quickly, we live it for others. We tell people we’re in a relationship on Facebook. We throw our pictures up on Instagram. We become a “we.” We make it seem shiny and perfect because what we choose to share is the highlight reel. We don’t share the 3am fights, the reddened eyes, the tear-stained bedsheets. We don’t write status updates about how their love for us shines a light on where we don’t love ourselves. We don’t tweet 140 characters of sadness when we’re having the kinds of conversations that can make or break the future of our love. This is not what we share. Shiny picture. Happy couple. Love is perfect. Then, we see these other happy, shiny couples and we compare. We are The Emoji Generation. Choice Culture. The Comparison Generation. Measuring up. Good enough. The best. Never before have we had such an incredible cornucopia of markers for what it looks like to live the Best Life Possible. We input, input, input and soon find ourselves in despair. We’ll never be good enough, because what we’re trying to measure up to just does not fucking exist. These lives do not exist. These relationships do not exist. Yet, we can’t believe it. We see it with our own eyes. And, we want it. And, we will make ourselves miserable until we get it. So, we break up. We break up because we’re not good enough, our lives aren’t good enough, our relationship isn’t good enough. We swipe, swipe, swipe, just a bit more on Tinder. We order someone up to our door just like a pizza. And, the cycle starts again. Emoji. “Good morning” text. Intimacy. Put down the phone. Couple selfie. Shiny, happy couple. Compare. Compare. Compare. The inevitable creeping in of latent, subtle dissatisfaction. The fights. “Something is wrong, but I don’t know what it is.” “This isn’t working.” “I need something more.” And, we break up. Another love lost. Another graveyard of shiny, happy couple selfies. On to the next. Searching for the elusive more. The next fix. The next gratification. The next quick hit. Living our lives in 140 characters, 5 second snaps, frozen filtered images, four minute movies, attention here, attention there. More as an illusion. We worry about settling, all the while making ourselves suffer thinking that anything less than the shiny, happy filtered life we’ve been accustomed to is settling. What is settling? We don’t know, but we fucking don’t want it. If it’s not perfect, it’s settling. If it’s not glittery filtered love, settling. If it’s not Pinterest-worthy, settling. We realize that this more we want is a lie. We want phone calls. We want to see a face we love absent of the blue dim of a phone screen. We want slowness. We want simplicity. We want a life that does not need the validation of likes, favorites, comments, upvotes. We may not know yet that we want this, but we do. We want connection, true connection. We want a love that builds, not a love that gets discarded for the next hit. We want to come home to people. We want to lay down our heads at the end of our lives and know we lived well, we lived the fuck out of our lives. This is what we want even if we don’t know it yet. Yet, this is not how we date now. This is not how we love now.” ~ Jamie Varon
* I want to add, that the traditional model of commitment to one, significant other, might also be outdated… people invest so much in one, significant other, and neglect the greater tribe and community of family, friends, and travellers… What happens when that one, significant other dies?
Who will you commit to, then?
If you commit to yourself, you can commit to anyone. Everyone.
Commitment: something to contemplate… “commitment/kəˈmɪtm(ə)nt/ noun the state or quality of being dedicated to a cause, activity, etc. an engagement or obligation that restricts freedom of action.”
Devotion: “devotion/dɪˈvəʊʃ(ə)n/ noun love, loyalty, or enthusiasm for a person or activity.”
The following information is being shared here on my personal blog to warn other tantra Goddesses in my field against working with Rakshith Asokan of Louisville, Kentucky (originally from India).
On December 15, 2020 Rakshith Asokan who works at Pleatco Filtration in Louisville, Kentucky asked for my two hour bath ceremony. I didn’t realize how wealthy he is and out of my kindness immediately offered him a two hour session for only $400 when these services are normally priced at $500 because I must purchase the space space first.
On December 15th I sent him an invoice to be paid immediately through my trusted credit card merchant and he agreed to pay it in full. I used all $120 of his advanced deposit to secure the space in Schaumburg and yesterday morning Rakshith Asokan lied to his bank and stated he didn’t recognize the charge. My credit card merchant asked…
(Osho’s talks are relevant to the zeitgeist of the 60’s to the 90’s.He is usually answering the questions of specific individuals, and answeringaccording to the needs of that specific individual; this is why people sometimes find him to be a hypocrite.What is true for one person, is not true for another. What is true for today’s circumstances, may not be true for tomorrow’s circumstances. However, within all teachings, there are timeless, and eternal truths, for the student to come to know; they can only be found by knowing what is not always true, and therefore, what is always true. The Paradox is the Location of Zen. This is the meaning of esoteric – the meaning is hidden, not because you are not allowed to have it, but because you don’t “get it”, yet. I Love Osho, because he became a voice in my head that I argued with, until I came to some kind of revelation, and found inner peace.)
Woman Has Been Repressed Continuously
“Man has ruled over women for millennia. He has been given every opportunity and chance and woman has been repressed continuously, has been crippled. She has not been allowed to compete with man shoulder to shoulder in life. That’s why we don’t know how many Gautam Buddhas on the women’s side did not get the opportunity to blossom. We don’t know how many Albert Einsteins have simply been denied any possibility for growth.
“It is a very strange thing that even dimensions like poetry, music, dance are dominated by men. The greatest dancers in the world have been men, not women. In fact, women should have been ahead of any male dancer. But one needs opportunity. One needs education, one needs training. If you bar the whole of womankind from education, training, discipline, you are making the whole society and the whole world poor, unnecessarily poor.
“My emphasis is to give respect to women – and equality is not against men. It is a world which belongs to you both and you both have to be together to make it as beautiful and as divine as possible. Man alone – you have been creating only wars. In three thousand years, five thousand wars…Is life just to fight? Is life just to kill, massacre, rape? Your whole history is full of murder and you call those murderers your great men.”
“If all over the world the woman is allowed freedom to grow to her potential, there will be many, many women enlightened; many, many women mystics, poets, painters. And they will enhance not only the woman’s part of the world – because the world is one – they will enhance the whole world. They will give man also new dimensions because their ways of seeing things are different. Man looks at things in one way; the woman looks from a different perspective. Life will become richer.
“It is for the betterment of both man and woman that the woman should be given every freedom and equal opportunity for her individuality. Then there will be a sense of humor. And the woman can laugh more gracefully than man, she has every potential for it – but it is repressed, condemned, criticized. She has lived a life of such misery that you cannot hope that she will show some sense of humor.
“But the day is not far away…then the whole earth will be full of laughter. Instead of talks about war, instead of politicians giving speeches all around the world, instead of the sermons of stupid priests who know nothing, it will be far better that every man and every woman is able to see the hilarious side of life and to enjoy it.”
Osho, The New Dawn, Talk #31
Christianity Destroyed Thousands of Wise Women
“Christianity destroyed thousands of wise women, burned them alive. Even the name “witch” – which means “a wise woman” and nothing else – became so condemnatory…and the same happened in the East. All the religions prohibited women, and I can see that the reason is a great fear that if women are allowed the same opportunity as is given to men, they will be far ahead in the experience of God. And that is against the ego of man.”
Osho, The Hidden Splendor, Talk #22
Half of Humanity Is Deprived of Raising its Consciousness
“Man has been beating women, repressing women, condemning women. And not knowing that condemning women, repressing women is making them inferior, half of humanity is deprived of raising its consciousness. And you are deprived, because you could also have learned the art of moving upwards from half of the universe. You could also have moved on the same way, on the same path; hence I always say, the liberation of women is also the liberation of man. It is more the liberation of man than the liberation of women.”
Osho, Socrates Poisoned Again After 25 Centuries, Talk #21
Unless Women Are Liberated, Men Will Never Be Liberated
“I have accepted women for the first time on an equal basis to men. I am in favor of women’s liberation because I know that unless women are liberated, men will never be liberated. Their liberation is together, because they are two sides of the same coin. Naturally many more women have come, because for centuries they were denied, they were insulted, they were never accepted as equal to men. Naturally, more and more women will be coming – and only those men will be here who are ready to accept women as their equal. No male chauvinists can remain around me. It is a family of equal people, with equal dignity.
“If women had been respected in the past, humanity would not have been in such a mess as it is today – because women are half of humanity. Half of humanity has remained undignified, uneducated, deprived of all freedom, all movement. We have hampered, handicapped ourselves. We have destroyed half of ourselves, and if we are in misery then who is to be blamed?
“I am all in favor of women’s liberation – but not the way the women’s liberation movement is going. It is taking a reactionary attitude, it is not a real revolution. It is trying to imitate man. And remember, imitation never makes you equal; imitation at the most will make you a carbon copy – but the original is original.”
Osho, Socrates Poisoned Again After 25 Centuries, Talk #7
Man Suffers from a Great Inferiority Complex
“Man suffers from a great inferiority complex because he cannot give birth to children. It is one of the deepest unconscious inferiorities in man. He knows the woman is superior, because in life there can be nothing higher than giving birth to life.
“Man’s function, his participation in giving birth to life, is negligible. It is not more than a syringe injection. It can be done by a syringe – he can be absolutely relieved of taking part in reproduction. He must have felt it from the very beginning. And the only way to overcome this inferiority complex was to reduce the woman in every possible way to such an inferior position that man can forget his inferiority complex and start believing that he is superior.
“All the societies of the world, all the cultures, all the religions in different ways have been doing the same: reducing the woman to a secondary category of humanity not equal to man.”
Osho, The Sword and the Lotus, Talk #17
The Woman Has Been Enslaved
“Almost all the religions have denied women the possibility of entering into paradise from the body of a woman. She can be virtuous. Her husband is her god. She should serve the husband with total commitment and devotion. This is the only religion as far as the woman is concerned. This will bring her into the body of a man in her next life, and then the doors open. Then she can strive for spiritual heights. Then she can become an enlightened master.
“There are religions which don’t allow women to read the religious scriptures. There are religions which don’t allow the women to enter their temples. The woman has been enslaved. She has been reduced into producing children, taking care of them her whole life. She has not to be respected as a human being. She is just a reproductive mechanism.
“Man has done everything wrong that can be done, everything inhuman that can be done. In Hinduism, if the husband died, the woman had to jump alive into his funeral pyre. This was thought to be something spiritual. This is pure murder – and a very crude and primitive murder. For thousands of years it was a great spiritual thing, but it is strange that the man never did such a great spiritual thing. No man in the whole of history has ever jumped into the funeral pyre of his dead wife. No brahmin followed the rule that he has made for women. If it is true, then is it not very strange why the man is not doing the same?”
Osho, The Sword and the Lotus, Talk #17
There Are a Few Differences Between Men and Women
“Most of the differences between men and women are because of thousands of years of conditioning. They are not fundamental to nature, but there are a few differences which give them unique beauty, individuality. Those differences can be counted very easily.
“One is that the woman is capable of producing life; man is not. In that way he is inferior, and that inferiority has played a great role in the domination of women by men. The inferiority complex works in this way: it pretends to be superior – to deceive oneself and to deceive the whole world. So man down the ages has been destroying the woman’s genius, talents, capacities, so that he can prove himself superior – to himself and to the world.
“Because the woman gives birth, for nine months or more she remains absolutely vulnerable, dependent on man. Men have exploited this in a very ugly way. And that is a physiological difference; it makes no difference at all.
“The psychology of the woman is corrupted by man telling her things which are not true, making her a slave to man, reducing her to a secondary citizen of the world. And the reason for that was that he is muscularly more powerful. But the muscular power is part of animality. If that is going to decide the superiority, then any animal is more muscular than a man.”
Osho, The Sword and the Lotus, Talk #5
The Woman Can Be Satisfied with one Love
“But real differences are certainly there, and we have to search for them behind the pile of invented differences. One difference I see is that a woman is more capable of love than a man is. A man’s love is more or less a physical necessity; a woman’s love is not. It is something greater and higher; it is a spiritual experience. That’s why the woman is monogamous and man is polygamous. The man would like to have all the world’s women, and still he would not be satisfied. His discontent is infinite.
“The woman can be satisfied with one love, utterly fulfilled, because she does not look at the body of the man, she looks at his innermost qualities. She does not fall in love with a man who has a beautiful muscular body, she falls in love with a man who has charisma – something indefinable, but immensely attractive – who has a mystery to be explored. She wants her man not to be just a man, but an adventure in discovering consciousness.
“The man is very weak as far as sexuality is concerned; he can have only one orgasm. The woman is infinitely superior; she can have multiple orgasms. And this has been one of the most troublesome matters. The man’s orgasm is local, confined to his genitals. The woman’s orgasm is total, not confined to the genitals. Her whole body is sexual, and she can have a beautiful orgasmic experience a thousandfold bigger, deeper, more enriching, more nourishing than a man can have.
“But the tragedy is that her whole body has to be aroused, and the man is not interested in it, he has never been interested in it. He has used the woman as a sex machine just to relieve his own sexual tensions. Within seconds he is finished. And by the time he is finished, the woman has not even begun.”
Osho, The Sword and the Lotus, Talk #5
The Woman Has the Capacity for Multiple Orgasms
“When love happens, it has beauty. When it is made to happen, it is ugly.
“And while you are making love with the man on top of the woman…it is known as the missionary posture. The East became aware of this ugliness that the man was heavier, taller and more muscular; he was crushing a delicate being. In the East, the way has always been just the opposite: the woman on top. Crushed under the weight of the man, the woman has no mobility. Only the man moves, so he comes to orgasm within seconds and the woman is simply in tears. She has been a partner, but she was not involved in it. She has been used.
“When the woman is on top she has more mobility, the man has less mobility, and that will bring their orgasms closer to each other. And when both go into orgasmic experience, it is something of the other world. It is the first glimpse of samadhi; it is the first glimpse that man is not the body. He forgets the body, he forgets the world. Both the man and the woman move into a new dimension they have never explored.
“The woman has the capacity for multiple orgasms, so the man has to be as slow as possible. But the reality is, he is in such a hurry in everything that he destroys the whole relationship. He should be very relaxed so that the woman can have multiple orgasms. His orgasm should come at the end, when the woman’s orgasm has reached to the peak. It is a simple question of understanding.”
Osho, The Sword and the Lotus, Talk #5
The Man Is Afraid
“A woman is more centered than a man… She is more serene, more silent, more patient, is capable of waiting. Perhaps because of these qualities she has more resistance to diseases and she lives longer than a man. Because of her serenity, her, she can fulfill a man’s life immensely. She can surround man’s life in a very soothing, cozy atmosphere.
“But the man is afraid – he does not want to be surrounded by the woman, he does not want to let her create a cozy warmth around him. He is afraid because that way he will become dependent. So for centuries he has been keeping her at a distance. And he is afraid because he knows deep down that the woman is more than he is. She can give birth to life. Nature has chosen her to reproduce, not man.
“Man’s function in reproduction is almost nil. This inferiority has created the greatest problem – man started cutting the woman’s wings. He started in every way reducing her, condemning her, so that he could at least believe that he is superior. He has treated women as cattle – even worse. In China, for thousands of years, the woman was not thought to have a soul, so the husband could kill her and the law would not interfere – she was his possession. If he wanted to destroy his furniture, it was not illegal. If he wanted to destroy his woman, it was not illegal. This is the ultimate insult – that the woman has no soul.”
Osho, The Sword and the Lotus, Talk #5
Half of Humanity Is Kept in a Downtrodden State
“Man has dominated women for centuries and forced the idea on them that they are the weaker sex, that they cannot do anything that man can do. They can do small homely things – that is their world. I want to destroy that idea completely…
“And this is a strange way: to keep half of humanity in a downtrodden state. How much is the loss? Half of humanity means that women, if they were accepted as equal, would have produced a Dostoevsky, a Turgenev, a Chekhov, a Gorky, a van Gogh, a Picasso, a Nijinsky. They may have proved a Buddha, a Jesus. Half of humanity! It is a vast ocean to whom you have denied all possibilities of creation, expression. And you have behaved with women as if they are cattle, not human beings.”
Osho, The Last Testament, Vol. 1, Talk #19
Women’s Slavery is Automatically Men’s Slavery
“Women’s liberation is automatically men’s liberation. Women’s slavery is automatically men’s slavery. They go together.”
Osho, The Last Testament, Vol. 1, Talk #19
‘Boys Will Be Boys’
Osho, I become interested in other women besides my wife, but when my wife shows interest in some other man I become very jealous. I burn in a terrible fire.
“Men have always created freedom for themselves, but obstructed women. Men have imprisoned women within the four walls of the house and have allowed themselves freedom. Those days are gone. Now women are as free as you are. And if you don’t want to burn in jealousy, there are only two ways: one way is that you yourself become free of desire. Where there is no desire, jealousy cannot remain. And the other way: if you don’t want to become free of desire, then at least give the same rights to the other as you have. Gather this much courage. I would like you to become free of desire.
“If you have known one woman, you have known all women. If you have known one man, you have known all men. Then the differences are only in the outer form. And the one who has not known all women in knowing the one woman, understand that he is living unconsciously. Even knowing innumerable women he will not be able to know, he simply will never know. Knowing happens through awareness, and he is unconscious. He will go on chasing women, dropping one to go after another.
“Certainly you will burn, because it hurts the male ego. You think it is completely fine that you become interested in other people’s women, that there is no problem in it. We say: ‘Boys will be boys.’ Men have created this saying because they think that a man will not be satisfied with one woman, that a man wants many women, but that a woman will be satisfied with only one man. These are just male tricks. A woman should be satisfied with one man – and that one is you! But you? – how can you be satisfied with one? You are a man! You think there should be more freedom for a man…
“Your wife has as much right to her freedom as you demand for yourself. And if you find that, no, it is not right that your wife becomes interested in other men, then your being interested in other women is also not right. What you expect of your wife you should become, you should act in the same way. Only then do you have any right.”
Osho, Die O Yogi Die , Talk #8
In a Better World a Man Will Be Both, a Woman Will Be Both
“Man has been taught to be just a man: never to show any feminine traits, never to show any softness of the heart, never to show any receptivity, always be aggressive. Man has been taught never to cry, never weep – because tears are feminine.
“Women have been taught never to be in any way like the male: never to show aggression, never show expression, to always remain passive, receptive. This is against reality, and this has crippled both.
“In a better world, with better understanding, a man will be both, a woman will be both – because sometimes a man needs to be a woman. There are moments when he needs to be soft – tender moments, love-moments. And there are moments when a woman needs to be expressive and aggressive – in anger, in defence, in rebellion. If a woman is simply passive, then she will turn into a slave automatically. A passive woman is bound to become a slave – that’s what happened down the ages. And an aggressive man, emphatically aggressive and never tender, is bound to create wars, neurosis in the world, violence.
“Man has been fighting, continuously fighting; it seems that man exists on the earth just to fight. In three thousand years there have been five thousand wars. War continues somewhere or other, the earth is never whole and healthy…never a moment without war. Either it is in Korea, or it is in Vietnam, or it is in Israel, or India, Pakistan, or in Bangladesh; somewhere the massacre has to continue.”
Osho, The Heart Sutra, Talk #3
The Womb Is a Central Phenomenon in the Feminine Body
“The first thing to be understood: men and women are different; not only different, but opposites. But they are not unequal, they are equal. There is difference, there is oppositeness, there is a polarity, but they are not unequal, they are equal. Two opposites are always equal, otherwise they cannot oppose each other.
“The second thing to be understood: The female body exists for a totally different purpose – biologically, physiologically, chemically. It has a different function to fulfill than the male body. And it is so different from the male body that unless you penetrate into the deeper layers of biology you will not be able to understand the difference. They exist as if in two worlds apart. The woman carries a womb.
“The very word ‘woman’ comes from ‘man with a womb’. And the womb is so important – nothing is more important than the womb, because a new life has to come through it. The whole moving phenomenon of life passes through it; it is the very gate into this world. And because of the womb, the woman has to be receptive, she cannot be aggressive. The womb cannot be aggressive; it has to receive, it has to be an opening, it has to invite the unknown. The womb has to be a host; the man will be the guest.
“Because of the womb being a central phenomenon in the feminine body, the whole psychology of woman differs. She is non-aggressive, non-inquiring, non-questioning, non-doubting, because all those things are part of aggression. The man doubts, he inquires, he goes in search; she waits. The man will come in search of her. She will not take the initiative, she simply waits – and she can wait infinitely.“
Osho, The Mustard Seed, Talk #18
*Originally posted on my fb page that I quit using in 2018. Men hated it.
NLP or Neuro-Linguistic Programming is one of the world’s most prevalent methods of mind control, used by everyone from sales callers to politicians to media pundits, and it’s nasty to the core. Here’s ten ways to make sure nobody uses it on you… ever.
Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a method for controlling people’s minds that was invented by Richard Bandler and John Grinder in the 1970s, became popular in the psychoanalytic, occult and New Age worlds in the 1980s, and advertising, marketing and politics in the 1990s and 2000s. It’s become so interwoven with how people are communicated to and marketed at that its use is largely invisible. It’s also somewhat of a pernicious, devilish force in the world—nearly everybody in the business of influencing people has studied at least some of its techniques. Masters of it are notorious for having a Rasputin-like ability to trick people in incredible ways—most of all themselves.
After explaining a bit about what NLP is and where it came from, I’m going to break down 10 ways to inoculate yourself against its use. You’ll likely be spotting it left, right and center in the media with a few tips on what to look for. Full disclosure: During my 20s, I spent years studying New Age, magical and religious systems for changing consciousness. One of them was NLP. I’ve been on both ends of the spectrum: I’ve had people ruthlessly use NLP to attempt to control me, and I’ve also trained in it and even used it in the advertising world. Despite early fascination, by 2008 or so I had largely come to the conclusion that it’s next to useless—a way of manipulating language that greatly overestimates its own effectiveness as a discipline, really doesn’t achieve much in the way of any kind of lasting change, and contains no real core of respect for people or even true understanding of how people work.
After throwing it to the wayside, however, I became convinced that understanding NLP is crucial simply so that people can resist its use. It’s kind of like the whole PUA thing that was popular in the mid-00s—a group of a few techniques that worked for a few unscrupulous people until the public figured out what was going on and rejected it, like the body identifying and rejecting foreign material.
What is NLP, and where did it come from?
“Neuro-linguistic programming” is a marketing term for a “science” that two Californians—Richard Bandler and John Grinder—came up with in the 1970s. Bandler was a stoner student at UC Santa Cruz (just like I later was in the 00s), then a mecca for psychedelics, hippies and radical thinking (now a mecca for Silicon Valley hopefuls). Grinder was at the time an associate professor in linguistics at the university (he had previously served as a Captain in the US Special Forces and in the intelligence community, ahem not that this, you know, is important… aheh…). Together, they worked at modeling the techniques of Fritz Perls (founder of Gestalt therapy), family therapist Virginia Satir and, most importantly, the preternaturally gifted hypnotherapist Milton Erickson. Bandler and Grinder sought to reject much of what they saw as the ineffectiveness of talk therapy and cut straight to the heart of what techniques actually worked to produce behavioral change. Inspired by the computer revolution—Bandler was a computer science major—they also sought to develop a psychological programming language for human beings.
What they came up with was a kind of evolution of hypnotherapy—while classical hypnosis depends on techniques for putting patients into suggestive trances (even to the point of losing consciousness on command), NLP is much less heavy-handed: it’s a technique of layering subtle meaning into spoken or written language so that you can implant suggestions into a person’s unconscious mind without them knowing what you’re doing.
Richard Bandler, co-creator of NLP, in 2007. (Via Wikimedia Commons)
Though mainstream therapists rejected NLP as pseudoscientific nonsense (it has been officially peer reviewed and discredited as an intervention technique), it nonetheless caught on. It was still the 1970s, and the Human Potential Movement was in full swing—and NLP was the new darling. Immediately building a publishing, speaking and training empire, by 1980 Bandler had made over $800,000 from his creation—he was even being called on to train corporate leaders, the army and the CIA. Self-help gurus like Tony Robbins used NLP techniques to become millionaires in the 1980s (Robbins now has an estimated net worth of $480 million). By the middle of the decade, NLP was such big business that lawsuits and wars had erupted over who had the rights to teach it, or even to use the term “NLP.”
But by that time, Bandler had bigger problems than copyright disputes: he was on trial for the alleged murder of prostitute Corine Christensen in November 1986. The prosecution claimed that Bandler had shot Christensen, 34, point-blank in the face with a .357 Magnum in a drug deal gone bad. According to the press at the time, Bandler had discovered an even better way to get people to like him than NLP—cocaine—and become embroiled in a far darker game, even, than mind control. A much-recommended investigation into the case published by Mother Jones in 1989 opens with these chilling lines:
In the morning Corine Christensen last snorted cocaine, she found herself, straw in hand, looking down the barrel of a .357 Magnum revolver. When the gun exploded, momentarily piercing the autumn stillness, it sent a single bullet on a diagonal path through her left nostril and into her brain.
Christensen slumped over her round oak dining table, bleeding onto its glass top, a loose-leaf notebook, and a slip of yellow memo paper on which she had scrawled, in red ink, DON’T KILL US ALL. Choking, she spit blood onto a wine goblet, a tequila bottle, and the shirt of the man who would be accused of her murder, then slid sideways off the chair and fell on her back. Within minutes she lay still.
As Christensen lay dying, two men left her rented town house in a working-class section of Santa Cruz, California. One was her former boyfriend, James Marino, an admitted cocaine dealer and convicted burglar. The other, Richard Bandler, was known internationally as the cofounder of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), a controversial approach to psychology and communication. About 12 hours later, on the evening of November 3, 1986, Richard Bandler was arrested and charged with the murder.
Bandler’s defense was, simply, that Marino had killed Christensen, not him. Many at the time alleged he used NLP techniques on the stand to escape conviction. Yet Bandler was also alleged to actually use a gun in NLP sessions in order to produce dramatic psychological changes in clients—a technique that was later mirrored by Hollywood in the movie Fight Club, in which Brad Pitt’s character pulls a gun on a gas station attendant and threatens to kill him if he doesn’t pursue his dreams in life. That was, many said, Bandler’s MO.
Whatever the truth of the matter, Bandler was indeed let off, and the story was quickly buried—I’ve never spoken to a student of NLP who’s ever heard of the murder case, I’ll note, and I’ve spoken to a lot. The case hardly impeded the growing popularity of NLP, however, which was now big business, working its way not only into the toolkit of psychotherapists but also into nearly every corner of the political and advertising worlds, having grown far beyond the single personage of Richard Bandler, though he continued (and continues) to command outrageous prices for NLP trainings throughout the world.
Today, the techniques of NLP and Ericksonian-style hypnotic writing can be readily seen in the world of Internet marketing, online get-rich-quick schemes and scams. (For more on this, see the excellent article Scamworld: ‘Get rich quick’ schemes mutate into an online monster by my friend Joseph Flatley, one of the best articles I’ve ever read on the Web.) Their most prominent public usage has likely been by Barack Obama, whose 2008 “Change” campaign was a masterpiece of Ericksonian permissive hypnosis. The celebrity hypnotist and illusionist Derren Brown also demonstrates NLP techniques in his routine.
How exactly does this thing work?
NLP is taught in a pyramid structure, with the more advanced techniques reserved for multi-thousand-dollar seminars. To oversimplify an overcomplicated subject, it more or less works like this: first, the user (or “NLPer,” as NLP people often refer to themselves—and I should note here that the large majority of NLP people, especially those who are primarily therapists, are likely well-meaning) of NLP pays very, very close attention to the person they’re working with. By watching subtle cues like eye movement, skin flush, pupil dilation and nervous tics, a skilled NLP person can quickly determine:
a) What side of the brain a person is predominantly using;
b) What sense (sight, smell, etc.) is most predominant in their brain;
c) How their brain stores and utilizes information (ALL of this can be gleaned from eye movements);
d) When they’re lying or making information up.
After this initial round of information gathering, the “NLPer” begins to slowly and subtly mimic the client, taking on not only their body language but also their speech mannerisms, and will begin speaking with language patterns designed to target the client’s primary sense.
An NLP person essentially carefully fakes the social cues that cause a person to drop their guard and enter a state of openness and suggestibility.
For instance, a person predominantly focused on sight will be spoken to in language using visual metaphors—”Do you see what I’m saying?” “Look at it this way”—while a person for which hearing is the dominant sense will be spoken to in auditory language—”Hear me out,” “I’m listening to you closely.”
By mirroring body language and linguistic patterns, the NLPer is attempting to achieve one very specific response: rapport. Rapport is the mental and physiological state that a human enters when they let their social guard down, and it is generally achieved when a person comes to the conclusion that the person they’re talking to is just like them. See how that works, broadly? An NLP person essentially carefully fakes the social cues that cause a person to drop their guard and enter a state of openness and suggestibility.
Once rapport is achieved, the NLPer will then begin subtly leading the interaction. Having mirrored the other person, they can now make subtle changes to actually influence the other person’s behavior. Combined with subtle language patterns, leading questions and a whole slew of other techniques, a skilled NLPer can at this point steer the other person wherever they like, as long as the other person isn’t aware of what’s happening and thinks everything is arising organically, or has given consent. That means it’s actually fairly hard to use NLP to get people to act out-of-character, but it can be used for engineering responses within a person’s normal range of behavior—like donating to a cause, making a decision they were putting off, or going home with you for the night if they might have considered it anyway.
From this point, the NLPer will seek to do two things—elicit and anchor. Eliciting happens when an NLPer uses leading and language to engineer an emotional state—for instance, hunger. Once a state has been elicited, the NLPer can then anchor it with a physical cue—for instance, touching your shoulder. In theory, if done right, the NLPer can then call up the hungry state any time they touch your shoulder in the same way. It’s conditioning, plain and simple.
How can I make sure nobody pulls this horseshit on me?
I’ve had all kinds of people attempt to “NLP” me into submission, including multiple people I’ve worked for over extended periods of time, and even people I’ve been in relationships with. Consequently, I’ve developed a pretty keen immune response to it. I’ve also studied its mechanics very closely, largely to resist the nonsense of said people. Here’s a few key methods I’ve picked up.
1. Be extremely wary of people copying your body language.
If you’re talking to somebody who may be into NLP, and you notice that they’re sitting in exactly the same way as you, or mirroring the way you have your hands, test them by making a few movements and seeing if they do the same thing. Skilled NLPers will be better at masking this than newer ones, but newer ones will always immediately copy the same movement. This is a good time to call people on their shit.
2. Move your eyes in random and unpredictable patterns.
Such NLP. So sociopathy. Wow.
This is freaking hilarious to do to troll NLPers. Especially in the initial stages of rapport induction, an NLP user will be paying incredibly close attention to your eyes. You may think it’s because they’re intensely interested in what you’re saying. They are, but not because they actually care about your thoughts: They’re watching your eye movements to see how you store and access information. In a few minutes, they’ll not only be able to tell when you’re lying or making something up, they’ll also be able to figure out what parts of your brain you’re using when you’re speaking, which can then lead them to be so clued in to what you’re thinking that they almost come across as having some kind of psychic insight into your innermost thoughts. A clever hack for this is just to randomly dart your eyes around—look up to the right, to the left, side to side, down… make it seem natural, but do it randomly and with no pattern. This will drive an NLP person utterly nuts because you’ll be throwing off their calibration.
3. Do not let anybody touch you.
This is pretty obvious and kind of goes without saying in general. But let’s say you’re having a conversation with somebody you know is into NLP, and you find yourself in a heightened emotional state—maybe you start laughing really hard, or get really angry, or something similar—and the person you’re talking to touches you while you’re in that state. They might, for instance, tap you on the shoulder. What just happened? They anchored you so that later, if they want to put you back into the state you were just in, they can (or so the wayward logic of NLP dictates) touch you in the same place. Just be like, oh hell no you did not.
4. Be wary of vague language.
One of the primary techniques that NLP took from Milton Erickson is the use of vague language to induce hypnotic trance. Erickson found that the more vague language is, the more it leads people into trance, because there is less that a person is liable to disagree with or react to. Alternately, more specific language will take a person out of trance. (Note Obama’s use of this specific technique in the “Change” campaign, a word so vague that anybody could read anything into it.)
5. Be wary of permissive language.
“Feel free to relax.” “You’re welcome to test drive this car if you like.” “You can enjoy this as much as you like.” Watch the f*k out for this. This was a major insight of pre-NLP hypnotists like Erickson: the best way to get somebody to do something, including going into a trance, is by allowing them to give you permission to do so. Because of this, skilled hypnotists will NEVER command you outright to do something—i.e. “Go into a trance.” They WILL say things like “Feel free to become as relaxed as you like.”
6. Be wary of gibberish.
Nonsense phrases like “As you release this feeling more and more you will find yourself moving into present alignment with the sound of your success more and more.” This kind of gibberish is the bread and butter of the pacing-and-leading phase of NLP; the hypnotist isn’t actually saying anything, they’re just trying to program your internal emotional states and move you towards where they want you to go. ALWAYS say “Can you be more specific about that” or “Can you explain exactly what you mean?” This does two things: it interrupts this whole technique, and it also forces the conversation into specific language, breaking the trance-inducing use of vague language we discussed in #4.
7. Read between the lines.
NLP people will consistently use language with hidden or layered meanings. For instance “Diet, nutrition and sleep with me are the most important things, don’t you think?” On the surface, if you heard this sentence quickly, it would seem like an obvious statement that you would probably agree with without much thought. Yes, of course diet, nutrition and sleep are important things, sure, and this person’s really into being healthy, that’s great. But what’s the layered-in message? “Diet, nutrition and sleep with me are the most important things, don’t you think?” Yep, and you just unconsciously agreed to it. Skilled NLPers can be incredibly subtle with this.
8. Watch your attention.
Be very careful about zoning out around NLP people—it’s an invitation to leap in with an unconscious cue. Here’s an example: An NLP user who was attempting to get me to write for his blog for free noticed I appeared not to be paying attention and was looking into the distance, and then started using the technique listed in #7 by talking about how he never has to pay for anything because media outlets send him review copies of books and albums for free. “Everything for free,” he began hissing at me. “I get everything. For. Free.” Obvious, no?
9. Don’t agree to anything.
If you find yourself being led to make a quick decision on something, and feel you’re being steered, leave the situation. Wait 24 hours before making any decisions, especially financial ones. Do NOT let yourself get swept up into making an emotional decision in the spur of the moment. Sales people are armed with NLP techniques specifically for engineering impulse buys. Don’t do it. Leave, and use your rational mind.
10. Trust your intuition.
And the foremost and primary rule: If your gut tells you somebody is fucking with you, or you feel uneasy around them, trust it. NLP people almost always seem “off,” dodgy, or like used car salesmen. Flee, or request they show you the respect of not applying NLP techniques when interacting with you.
Hopefully this short guide will be of assistance to you in resisting this annoying and pernicious modern form of black magic. Take it with you on your phone or a printout next time you’re at a used car sales lot, getting signed up for a gym membership, or watching a politician speak on TV. You’ll easily find yourself surprised how you allow yourself to notice more and more NLP techniques… more and more… don’t you think?
(For more on NLP, check out the book Introducing NLP by Joseph O’Connor or the immensely useful Neuro-Linguistic Programming for Dummies. As a bonus, here’s a great video breaking down the use of NLP techniques by media outlets on both sides of the political spectrum, from FOX News to Stephen Colbert. It gets a bit into Christian conspiracy thinking, but is VERY good information.)
First there was Emptiness. The tai chi symbol itself was used by the Taoists and dates back to the 14th century BC and possibly earlier. As if that wasn’t old enough, it’s necessary to go back even further—much further–to appreciate this symbol and its meaning. In fact, according to Taoist lore, we have to travel back to the very beginning, to the time of emptiness, when there was only the infinite void.
The void, being a void, was empty. At the same time, it also contained all possibilities. However, these possibilities could not be manifested or created into form.
The Tai Chi Creative Force. The ability to move from simple possibility to actual manifestation and form is possible through the creative force of tai chi. Tai chi is the force or place of raw, undifferentiated energy. From this place, opposing or complementary forces can arise.
Yang and Yin Energies Arise. Out of the void, and through the separation and differentiation of the tai chi creative force, two primordial and complementary energies arose: the yang and the yin.
Yang. The yang energies are associated with the radiant light of the sun as well as its fiery heat. Yang energies are expansive and shoot outward.
Yin. Yin energies are associated with the dark of the moon and closing inward for rest, regeneration, regrowth, and creativity.
Complementary Energies. Yin-Yang energies are often thought of as dualities or polar opposites. Dark-light, cold-hot, female-male, matter-spirit, earth-heaven, down-up, soft-hard, closing-opening, and yielding-aggressive are other ways of characterizing these forces. However, one can also think of these energies as complementary, and sharing a common source.
Both are equally good. One cannot exist without the other. Neither is better than the other. This equality and interplay between the yin and the yang is depicted by the equal sizes of the dark swirling yin and that of the swirling white yang.
Yin to Yang and Yang to Yin. In the symbol, yang energy is always present within the yin, as represented by the small white circle engulfed in the black. Likewise, the swirling yang energy contains a seed of dark yin energy. Just as a child can go from tears to smiles in seconds, yang energy can quickly change into yin energy, and vice versa.
Constant Change. The amount of yin is constantly changing. So is the amount of yang. Both are constantly shifting in a cosmic energy dance.
Cycles of Change. Going back to the tai chi symbol, successive slices yield ever-changing amounts of black and white, yin and yang. This, like the circular shape of the symbol, shows the cycles of change—the movements from yin to yang, and yang to yin.
This is like the constant shift of the earth between day and night, summer and winter.
The tai chi creative force and humans. Changes in the balance between the yin and yang are also reflected in the lives of humans. The idea of tai chi provides a way for an individual to balance and to integrate yin and yang and everything inside—at the mundane to the spiritual levels.
The movements of tai chi forms–with gentle rhythms of expanding and shrinking, opening and closing, yang and yin–are a way to maintain balance within one’s self and one’s world.
Practicing the physical moves of tai chi is a way to access and to implement the possibilities contained within the tai chi force–including that of personal enlightenment.
At its simplest and deepest, the tai chi symbol is a symbol of existence and the process of creation. It holds a reminder of the very best that each of us can create, for ourselves and for the world.
EDIT 2022: since writing this post, I have learned even much more horrifying information. I will elaborate on this, at the end under Edit 2022. Until then, let the meme speak!
In 2018, I wrote the following post:
“A lot of people think, that the “LGBTQI+ community” is one, unified group of people.
Queers are actually a bunch of individuals, with their OWN infighting, and discordant politics; there are LGB’s who want to separate from the T+, BECAUSE: L’s and G’s and B’s are same-sex/both sexes attracted, and then there are Tschools of thought that “everyone should be pansexual!” and “there’s no such thing as same-sex!”. Or, if you’re a lesbian, your same-sex attraction is ‘transphobic’.
How does that philosophy fit into same-sex attractions and relationships?!
Then, you have trans people who want to liberate themselves from gay, lesbian, and binary politics altogether. But plenty of L, G, and B who DON’T. And within the trans community, you have those for surgery, and those against surgery. And M2F are completely different from F2M. – even trans is NOT a united front.
You also have L’s and G’s who differ in politics, and L’s who want their OWN COMMUNITIES.
Then, in that Lesbian community, you have *all sorts*… You have butches and femmes, non-binaries, fluid, and bisexuals. You have traditionals and progressives. Butches clashing with Butches. Hardcore lesbians clashing with bi-sexuals. There are also plenty of gay people for and against gay-marriage. Queers are NOT a united front. Plenty of them DON’T want to be lumped into a category, at all. Especially one that has nothing to do with what they’re into, or what is relevant to their health and lifestyle. None of the L’s, G’s, B’s, or T’s that I know, are interested in supporting *anything* harmful against children, or anyone. No one wants that. Some individuals believe trans-surgery is a form of self-harm; others don’t. Some believe getting fake boobs, or a nose-job, is a form of self-harm. Loving yourself, as you are, is difficult for many. Sometimes, it hides other psychological injuries. Some people want to be free to do whatever they want. Some people want to Heal themselves, or Heal others.
Relationships are seeking balance, everywhere.
I grew up in the queer community, and half my fam and 98% of my friends are gay. I *intimately know* all sorts of relationship dynamics, from platonic to romantic. All sides. Unconditional Love + Healthy Boundaries is where I live. ❤️”
Apart from being well-received by my usual circles of 98% queer friends, I had one friend-of-a-friend contact me in my inbox:
What have I learned since I wrote this in 2018?
I have learned that the LGB have indeed broken away from the T+ – the T+ is absolute chaos. Medically, sexually, interpersonally – and worldly – T has nothing at all to do with LGB Rights.
I have also learned that male-bodied T’s have begun infringing upon the rights of the women of the world; who are neither L or B, and completely spilling out of the “LGBTQI+” Umbrella. Thus making the T an issue that predominantly affects women, worldwide. THIS IS CLASSIC MALE-PREDATORY BEHAVIOUR. But it’s even worse for women, now, because it’s disguised.
No one was listening before this; women have been fighting patriarchy for so long. From Female Genital Mutilation (FGM), to Child-Brides; for freedom, equal human rights, and general safety from men.
Predators LOVE to hide. They’re opportunistic; they gaslight; they bully; they invade. They have criminal minds.
As mentioned, in 2014, F2M and M2F are completely different; also, technically not possible. It was just slang my friends and I used around the gay-table. I feel most comfortable using TiMs and TiFs: Trans-Identified Males, and Trans-Identified Females. Males have Male bodies, and Females have Female bodies.
In particular, these male-bodies have infiltrated female sports, effortlessly robbing women of scholarship opportunities they have worked and trained hard for, their entire lives – not to mention their safety and changerooms.
And in true, abusive-male style, women are not allowed to object. They have to submit, and play along with it; one objection, one language-slip, and they are violently abused and gaslighted – being called “transphobic”, or “terf”, while the mob screams rape and murder threats at them. All they are, is women objecting to The Naked Emperor before their very eyes, that no one is acknowledging, and expressing what the wisdom of their bodies is telling them: that they feel uncomfortable, or threatened, or unsafe in some way. “Going along” with it is known as “Fawning” – the lesser-known of Fight,Flight, Freeze – and Fawn. And I can guarantee, that most women (pansexual, straight, L or B) who Fawn about TiMs in public, have different stories to share in private. A common one, is that men who build their lives on their “white-male-privilege” and then become TiMs cannot begin to know the struggles women face in the world.
You can read the TRUE story, here, that the New York Magazine would never tell you.
However, some TiMs are sane, reasonable human-beings, who protect women, children, and reality:
I also learned that T’s are six-times more likely to have Autism.
Autism is a Developmental Disability. Some Traits of Autism include:
Reverses pronouns (e.g., says “you” instead of “I”)
Gives unrelated answers to questions
Does not understand jokes, sarcasm, or teasing
Does not understand personal space boundaries
Lack of fear or more fear than expected
Causing self injury
One woman told me her autistic son always called women with short hair, “he”, and another woman said her autistic-teen lacked empathy for others, and threw tantrums often.
Stay tuned for my next article; “Why You’re Not Two-Spirits.”
I have had to learn SO much about depraved male sexuality in order to protect myself, children, quiet women, and lesbians, and I resent having to know anything about them at all – worse of all, being involved in their sexual-fetish against my will: I consider that sexual assault. I don’t even want to talk about them, but people don’t know, so I have to. If they did know, would they ALLOW lesbians to be exposed to this?
When we ignore the horrors of the world, vulnerable people suffer. I’m sorry you had to meet “Chloe” – who is definitely not 37. But I am more sorry that women who Love women should have to lock-eyes with this predator, when swiping for a potential honey to date. *shudder* I can’t words anymore. Let the memes speak. And you: please find your voice.
AND IF THAT WASN’T ENOUGH…. if you haven’t heard of any of this, there’s a reason: Elon Musk revealed in The Twitter Files, that women’s dissenting voices had actively been suppressed, removing them – and information – from the Public Conversation, while Pro-Trans Propaganda roamed free, and confused and endangered children:
“We discovered evidence of a secret committee that systemically suppressed the visibility of disfavored speech: Feminists who dared define women as “adult human female,” like Megan Murphy and Kellie-Jay Keen, were kicked off Twitter… also gay women who pushed back on what they saw as the excesses of LGBTQ activism, like Jaimee Michell, were secretly suppressed. Entire user accounts were blocked from participating on the “trends” homepage or from ever being included in the feeds of those users who did not already follow the accounts. (This was the “Do Not Amplify” marker.)” – via Abigail Shrier